Every parent and educator has an obligation to broaden his or her perspective on the greatness of Hashem. They will then appreciate that God reveals Himself even in mundane matters, which is the way to God for people who are in the workforce. God is revealed in the soul, which is the spiritual path of artists. God is revealed through intellectual pursuit and logic, which is the path of those who are engaged in Torah study. The primary failure of education is educating a child along a path that is not appropriate for his or her soul. One who understands Hashem and recognizes the myriad ways in which He reveals Himself, can then mentor many people and direct them along the path that is appropriate for their unique spiritual roots.
One of the most basic rules of Chinuch (education) is that prior to examining the souls of one's own children a person needs to know that many facets of God and the many approaches to Torah, and the various forms of serving God. This will prevent the parent from becoming stuck in the notion that his path is the sole path to Hashem and thereby attempt to force the child along a path that is perhaps not at all the path for his soul. A parent doesn't give his child a soul, only the outer garments that clothe the soul. The child's path, however, is rooted in his own soul. It is therefore entirely possible for a parent to have a child whose spiritual path is completely unlike that of the parent. We see this all the time.
Even if a parent is open to the possibility of his child having an alternative path to God, if the parent does not value the path of the child, he will not be able to educate him properly. If the father thinks there is one proper path to serving God - perhaps he feels that it is through intensive Talmudic study - even if he senses that this is not the path for his child who would rather be engaged in stories or songs, if he doesn't force his child down the Talmudic path, but still feels his child's path is mistaken, there will be consequences in the child's overall foundation. Nothing fills a child with life more than the feeling that his parents are proud of him. If the father is still dreaming that his son would be someone else, all the candies and nice words won't help. If the heart isn't in it then the child won't get the nutrition he needs for proper growth.
But the parent can't lie to himself. If he really believes there is only one path to God then in his heart, his child is a failure. And his child will sense this. The parent needs to appreciate the multiplicity of approaches and value their manifestation of God's will, and happily encourage his child from the depths of his heart to go according to his nature and sanctify the name of God in the way that meets his own soul.
One of the most basic rules of Chinuch (education) is that prior to examining the souls of one's own children a person needs to know that many facets of God and the many approaches to Torah, and the various forms of serving God. This will prevent the parent from becoming stuck in the notion that his path is the sole path to Hashem and thereby attempt to force the child along a path that is perhaps not at all the path for his soul. A parent doesn't give his child a soul, only the outer garments that clothe the soul. The child's path, however, is rooted in his own soul. It is therefore entirely possible for a parent to have a child whose spiritual path is completely unlike that of the parent. We see this all the time.
Even if a parent is open to the possibility of his child having an alternative path to God, if the parent does not value the path of the child, he will not be able to educate him properly. If the father thinks there is one proper path to serving God - perhaps he feels that it is through intensive Talmudic study - even if he senses that this is not the path for his child who would rather be engaged in stories or songs, if he doesn't force his child down the Talmudic path, but still feels his child's path is mistaken, there will be consequences in the child's overall foundation. Nothing fills a child with life more than the feeling that his parents are proud of him. If the father is still dreaming that his son would be someone else, all the candies and nice words won't help. If the heart isn't in it then the child won't get the nutrition he needs for proper growth.
But the parent can't lie to himself. If he really believes there is only one path to God then in his heart, his child is a failure. And his child will sense this. The parent needs to appreciate the multiplicity of approaches and value their manifestation of God's will, and happily encourage his child from the depths of his heart to go according to his nature and sanctify the name of God in the way that meets his own soul.
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